Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Tent #3

Colin’s parents just got home with his kid  sister in their arms.  We were to rambunctious to stay in the house so we had to go in the back to the tent that was already pitched before I got there.  I think it was there the whole time and they only put it away when it started to snow.  Tents always seem out of place unless you are camping.  I just got up from a nap after passing out watching an uninteresting, long, sluggish movie titled “XXX.”  The noise of the minivan’s sliding door closing woke me up because my mom had the same car.  Still puzzled from the departure of my dream, I just stood up at their sunken faces.  A six foot man, resembling a lumber jack with the representational beard to mach holding his blond haired girl between his arms who was passed out from the long down while he was very close to his stocky, brown, curly haired five in a half foot wife who was drowsing off.  Late night at the opera house again which is where she worked and frequented often.  My eyes felt flourished, 2 perfect hours of sleep kept me in a trance of relatable starvation.  I needed to do something but we were advertently being kicked out at the same time.  What do you do in a TENT?  My childhood rage was almost getting the best of me and I began to become irritated by accepting his sleep over invitation. 

    We walked through his house, the only other kid’s house that mirrored my own.  Cluttered to the pint of non-inhabitation.  His living room was the only room that was clean but he lived in a much smaller house then I did or anyone else I knew so his furniture only consisted of a rose decorative love seat and a wooden rocking chair that circumvented their television.  We then went into his kitchen where the clutter really felt like home.  There refrigerator was crowed on all surrounding surfaces.  The top was stacked with different types of cereal and anything that was in recyclable cardboard.  Potato bags, potato chips, bananas and apples took up the counter space next to the refrigerator.  Bills and other letters sprinkled on his dining room seats while school work covered the accompanied table.  Vat food was next to the over which was across from the refrigerator.  Also the other counter space which was next to the cat food was filled with bread and plastic bags of food probably canned.  The tile was still the same before they moved in twenty years ago into this bright blue vacation house. 
    Then we entered into his back porch filled with used furniture.  His dad was a carpenter so either he received these as incentive after working over a house or he thought he would need them in the far off future.  Different assortment of bikes were back there as well while they rusted and the white painted walls were shedding revealing studs.  Then we opened the brown, wooden door leading into his back yard.  I’ve never slept over here so I was full of questions and Colin, the houses suitor, had the answers.  Nothing to glamorous but you need to know the place before you depend on sleeping there.
    “So what plants are in your garden?”
    “I think just some tulips, decorative flowers and tomatoes.”
    The same as my parents.  Must be good soil.  I was just trying to fill time but I didn’t a clue what you do in that damn tent.  The longer we were outside the better.  I was used to having televisions and xbox’x in my cousins tent with cords extending all the way back to the house but I don’t think Colin had any of this stuff.  His room was rather bland.  It didn’t even have a T.V.  It just had his guitar, a bed, and some books. 
    “See that tree.”
    “Yeah.”   
    “Make sure you piss on it to mark our territory to keep the strays away.”
    Dan who was much taller then me with his buzz cut, always invested his time with mechanical stuff and praised his own knowledge of cars and motorcycles but he was just living his fathers torn dreams.  He liked to look tough and act tough but we all knew he was a sissy and if we did anything problematic he would be the first one to snitch to whoever came up and asked.  We always gave him a hard time because we knew his true colors but he always needed some recognition.  He also had a humongous house and the nicest mother so we always tried to give him a call every once in a while just in case we would get the opportunity to go over there. 
    Colin, a pivotal genius, had a auburn bowl cut, lanky and would do anything.  He almost had no inhibition but he was supremely scared before we did anything but we inevitably do it first or when someone else did it and didn’t get hurt.  He had a good boy morality but he would always do what we did so he quickly couldn’t hold on for much longer.  We weren’t bad kids we just liked to have fun at the expense of our safety and health.  We would make movies based on the facts that we were juvenile daredevils.  So he was as much as a genius as the rest of us.  It never showed but in his grades.
    After playing in the barren yard we thought we should just go in the tent lined with pillows and sleeping bags.  To what I am used to and I would say that I go camping quite frequently this tent would fit 1 person.  It was designed for a uni-scavenger hunt enthusiast’s.  All we had was a flashlight that would only show one persons face.  The flashlight also produced this orange light that was dim in the dark.  Everything felt blurry and nostalgic while watching through it with the director’s eye.  We zipped it around the tent a few times making mesmerizing circles with the light.  Then, as the two of us were on our knees, one kid would go outside and watch the spectacle.  We were just amazed by everything.  It was probably a hyper-active nightmare but while the fun of the flash light shows slowly faded away we begin making shadow puppets.  Much easier said then done, all I knew was how to make a dog and form a toad with my two hands. 
    As the directing started taking a hold of us.  The ability to make something that possibly couldn’t be seen again we got to talking.  We would ask each other about movie ideas and maybe do a stand up comedy routine.  I liked making stuff that would entertain myself.  As the age we were everyone started talking about girls.  Not the knowledge of what I knew prior which was absolutely nothing but what could be considered even lower.  All we knew, the three of us was from porn.  We somehow got into the same subject at the same time in life.  I guess it’s the trickery of puberty, the chance of comradery.  The pure adrenaline, the restless kick you get once you have stayed up past your bedtime when your vision is hardly the same but your drive for entertainment which is the only reason you stayed up this late is necessarily increased.  The mix of the directing, the addiction to light and to the love of sight, and for our social connection of porn we decided to practice to what I believe as technique.  We were new to the genre of pornography and clueless of the art.  The more wisdom you have towards the art of porn the more you know of the skill it takes.  Dan has been watching porn because his older brother had a subscription to Playboy sent directly to his house.  He had to fandangle a time where he was always home to get the mail so he could sneak it past his parents.  Dan would tell us all the times his brother beat him up because he was always trying to sneak a peak.   But once into the pornography, the more you thrive for a taste of it.  I remember my first time with the arousal.  I found a dirty tape in my brothers room in 5th grade.  I saw it and didn’t know what to do with myself.  I’ve heard of masturbation but didn’t understand it.  I’ve known my body for 10 whole years how would I not know what it can and can’t do.  So I just took out my penis and rubbed it on the screen. 
    But this all made us want to do things.  We have already made our own movies why not try and go some where else.  For some reason my friends were all about jumping on each other in a tackle and humping you.  It was funny for the first few times but it got caught up in the no one is saying something I’ll do the group joke to get false laughs.  This led to the termination of that phase.  We led into that but with a audience too.  We had one on one and would switch off each other.  One the girl, one the guy.  We taped fictional drying humping porno movies for at least an hour and a half.  The grinding of the jeans on your partner, the natural ability to hump with a decrease and increase in torque led to some painful scrutiny.  Then the directing where you tried to get the best angle.  We all acted it out but through our imaginations viewed it as us and a girl that consisted of one of our crushes at school.  Every boy at least had one but the funny thing is that I never picturing having sex with them but them just being with me.  But then when the imagination started to fade and the realness of the situation took a hold you would have to then force your back to slapstick mode. But it took a halt when Dan whipped out his penis.  It was a rush of awkward dramatilization.  We weren’t ready for it but then Colin tried it which left me in a bind.  I just had to so I whipped it out and flopped it around like I knew what to do.  I was more in-experienced then this then a kid telling a grown-up about politics. We just went at it and seemed to not talk as much and just sort of take it until Dan took it to real.  I couldn’t determine if he was fantasizing or actually me.  When the novelty of the entertainment wore off and I became drowsy, I finally called it quits. I needed some sleep or just time to regress the past night.  Some how it was a mix of funny and habit that led us to such a handicapping experience because when you wake up in the morning you just want to run.  I walked home because he only lived about 15 minutes away but I pushed that moment way far back.  Never even contributing it to myself.  I hung out with Colin and Dan a lot of times after that night but we all never even discussed it.  There was never a moment where we even referred to it.  We didn’t tell our friends or anyone else.  It just led me farther into pornography so I could forget about everything I experienced and once knew.  No more imagination just pure hard facts.

No comments:

Post a Comment